Jimmy's Arms

Finally alone.
Nothing to say.
I never did have anything worth saying.
Blue-green eyes...
Why must I think of YOU
And remember everything I hate in MYSELF?
You never let down your arms.

Finally I'm lonely
And you can no longer do anything for me.
I just put my shoes on
And find comfort in my precious masochism
Alone
By myself.
You never let down your arms.

If January comes
And she comes
Alone,
By myself,
Then finally this box will be gone
After being dropped,
Then picked up.
After it rained,
And finally dried.
And after it was left,
And then remembered
Once you finally had a use for what's inside.
You never let down your arms.

Could you see me
All those nights I walked
And stood in the rain
With my arms open
Waiting for you,
Crying?
But you'd never know it.
The rain just washed my tears away
Finally landing at my shoes.
You never let down your arms.

Candy coated words.
Finally,
Dirtied kisses.
Beautiful flowers for Valentine's
That just got distracted
And forgotten like the box.
It's not the thought that counts
Anymore.
You never let down your arms.

If there's nothing I can do
Then why am I here?
Did I ask to be?
Tell me,
I forget,
Did you ask?
My shoes didn't walk me here,
But my feet hurt
From my new shoes.
You never let down your arms.

Can you hear my tapping red shoes when I play?
Watch my flying hands, Jimmy.
It's a rush like going down in an elevator
Except without that irritating music.
But eventually after I go up the stairs
And down the rushing elevator
I get sick and tired.
You never let down your arms.

When I was young,
My favorite ride was the merry-go-round.
All it does is turn you around and round.
Sometimes they pushed too fast
And I guess I fell down
I still can't seem to find my balance.
Why must my life be a masquerade?
I never used to like parties...
I guess things change, my dear.
You never let down your arms.

And that party.
That stupid Christmas party!
You remember her name, don't you?
Guess you weren't that messed up.
It seems your twin was the one
Standing in the rain
Holding my hand,
Right next to me.
Waiting.
Hey! What are best friends for?
Funny.
Mine seem to like Jimmy's bed.
You never let down your arms.

And what am I supposed to do?
Sit with my red shoes
And wait for you to call?
...You remember her face but not her number.
And now all you remember is her voice
And her breath,
But nothing she has said.
You never let down your arms.

I can't stay any longer.
I'm being dropped and rained on and forgotten.
And I'm lonely and crying
Finally, this time,
ALONE in the rain.
I'm sick of promises,
And elevators,
And this fair with my merry-go-round
And all that annoying circus music.
"Sorry ma'am. We seem to have lost your safety net."
Maybe you could've caught me.
You never let down your arms...
Guess you were waiting for something else to catch.
You missed me.
Somewhere, there,
In your parade
I mistook the ideas you spoon-fed me.
I guess I mistook the offing of your pants
For the offering of open arms.
I'll just put on my red shoes for playing,
Lay back and show MYSELF another way.
You never let down your arms.

Will you hold my shoes for a moment?
I'll try and remember I left
That box there
With the little red playing shoes on it.
I'll be back in a minute.
I have to go see if he's still out in the rain, waiting.
Oh! There he is.
This time I'll take his hand
And let our arms down.
Funny.
You never let down your arms.